You know the saying that goes something like, "If you love someone you should let them go"? Well, that should be amended to say, "If you love someone you should let them go at least once a week."
Here's my story:
I love being a mom, but the last few weeks I have been feeling a little bit funny. Let's be honest, by 'a little bit funny' I mean a little bit down. Finally, I had a teary breakdown. My husband decided (with love in his heart) that I needed to get away for an afternoon. This made me cry more. My husband said to me, "Are you sad that you are leaving her or sad that you WANT to leave her?" When I nodded to the second through my sobbing he replied, "Good." And it hit me. Of course it is good!! It is absolutely crazy to want to be with anyone (even a perfect, little babe) ALL THE TIME.
The danger of motherhood, is that you ARE. With someone all the time that is. At least for the beginning. And that is a lot. The true danger I would say though, is that you can very easily feel as though you should want this, and if you don't you might feel guilty. Well, I am here to tell you, from one primary caregiver to another, that getting outta dodge is AMAZING. One movie and a little shopping later I felt rejuvenated. This made me realize that getting away from being a mom is a crucial part of being a good mom. Bu-ya (or however you spell that). There it is.
Tuesday 27 November 2012
Christmas Memories
Although I have many, I am only going to share two. One is a real favourite memory, and one is just something that happened, twice. See if you can guess which!
1. Once, I mean twice, my dad decided that Christmas Eve was the best time to shovel the snow off the roof. And twice he fell off. Luckily one year my grandma was visiting, so he was able to use her cane.
2. One Christmas, in order to save some money, my mom decided to use the artificial tree that we had gotten from my Grandma when she moved into an apartment. My brother and I were home from university visiting in order to help decorate. When we set up the tree we realized it was ridiculously small. So, when my mom left to go to work for the evening my brother and I went and bought a real GIGANTIC tree. We set it up and decorated it. When my mom came home she cried.
What is Christmas without a few tears of joy?
1. Once, I mean twice, my dad decided that Christmas Eve was the best time to shovel the snow off the roof. And twice he fell off. Luckily one year my grandma was visiting, so he was able to use her cane.
2. One Christmas, in order to save some money, my mom decided to use the artificial tree that we had gotten from my Grandma when she moved into an apartment. My brother and I were home from university visiting in order to help decorate. When we set up the tree we realized it was ridiculously small. So, when my mom left to go to work for the evening my brother and I went and bought a real GIGANTIC tree. We set it up and decorated it. When my mom came home she cried.
What is Christmas without a few tears of joy?
Joy to the World
Here is my Letterman like top ten list for why I am feeling extra Joyful this holiday season:
10. I am not working.
9. It has already snowed quite a bit.
8. My Christmas dessert plans have grown from the pie to... drum roll... the pie, a gingerbread cake with dolce de leche icing, and Bailey's mousse. For those of you who know me, you know that I spend much of my day thinking about food, and so to have three super yummy desserts is making me super joyful!
7. Making lists of the presents I plan to buy people over and over and over again. Boy, I love making lists!
6. TV show Christmas episodes!! I LOVE THEM. So far I have watched the Christmas episodes from Felicity seasons one and two.
5. I have very special (and super fun) plans for Christmas Eve.
4. I'm going to have a fireplace.
3. My brother is coming home and I am SO excited to hang out with him!!
2. My husband, with whom I love spending time, has two weeks off work. Also, he will spoil me rotten. Hurray!
1. I have a baby, and honestly, she brings more joy than I could have ever imagined.
Joy to the world, the Lord has come.
10. I am not working.
9. It has already snowed quite a bit.
8. My Christmas dessert plans have grown from the pie to... drum roll... the pie, a gingerbread cake with dolce de leche icing, and Bailey's mousse. For those of you who know me, you know that I spend much of my day thinking about food, and so to have three super yummy desserts is making me super joyful!
7. Making lists of the presents I plan to buy people over and over and over again. Boy, I love making lists!
6. TV show Christmas episodes!! I LOVE THEM. So far I have watched the Christmas episodes from Felicity seasons one and two.
5. I have very special (and super fun) plans for Christmas Eve.
4. I'm going to have a fireplace.
3. My brother is coming home and I am SO excited to hang out with him!!
2. My husband, with whom I love spending time, has two weeks off work. Also, he will spoil me rotten. Hurray!
1. I have a baby, and honestly, she brings more joy than I could have ever imagined.
Joy to the world, the Lord has come.
What's your crazy?
I often lament how crazy certain people in my life are. Please keep in mind that I am not exactly sure of the connotation of 'lament' and that I should probably just have said that I often THINK of how 'crazy' certain people in my life are. I'm also pretty sure I should not be ending a sentence with ARE, but I just can't seem to work around it. Lastly, I totally know that using 'crazy' as such is likely offensive to some. Please understand that I don't use it to make fun of or minimize serious mental illness.
So really, my initial sentence should have read like this:
I often think about the mild to serious psychological problems of certain people in my life.
Ok, now that we have that straight, here goes. After thinking about certain ESPECIALLY loved ones last night, I came to two realizations and two conclusions:
Realizations:
1. The first is that we are all at least a little bit crazy. At least. All I mean to say is that we all have some issues that could perhaps be diagnosed by a psychologist or psychiatrist and would probably get better with pharmaceuticals or talk therapy. I, for example, suffer from from an irrational fear that everyone is mad at me most of the time. For example, when anyone honks, I am sure they are honking at me. I also get extremely mad (and I mean mad) when I get tailgated because I know that means that the person tailgating me is unhappy with my speed which makes me really defensive and therefore leads to anger. This, of course, creates a lot of anxiety. Duh.
2. Our parents did it to us. Sometimes directly (like by always being mad at us, for example) or indirectly (by giving us angry genes).
Conclusions:
1. Not to get Jerry Springer on you or anything, but my first conclusion is that we should take it easy on ourselves, (pause) and each other. The reality is that some of the things others do that drive us totally crazy are things that either they cannot help or that it would be VERY difficult for them to help. AND, since you have your own crazy (that, just to review, cannot be helped without a lot of work) you should give yourself a break. You deserve it
2. You're gunna make your kids crazy (it seems to be inevitable). Just try not to make them too crazy!
So really, my initial sentence should have read like this:
I often think about the mild to serious psychological problems of certain people in my life.
Ok, now that we have that straight, here goes. After thinking about certain ESPECIALLY loved ones last night, I came to two realizations and two conclusions:
Realizations:
1. The first is that we are all at least a little bit crazy. At least. All I mean to say is that we all have some issues that could perhaps be diagnosed by a psychologist or psychiatrist and would probably get better with pharmaceuticals or talk therapy. I, for example, suffer from from an irrational fear that everyone is mad at me most of the time. For example, when anyone honks, I am sure they are honking at me. I also get extremely mad (and I mean mad) when I get tailgated because I know that means that the person tailgating me is unhappy with my speed which makes me really defensive and therefore leads to anger. This, of course, creates a lot of anxiety. Duh.
2. Our parents did it to us. Sometimes directly (like by always being mad at us, for example) or indirectly (by giving us angry genes).
Conclusions:
1. Not to get Jerry Springer on you or anything, but my first conclusion is that we should take it easy on ourselves, (pause) and each other. The reality is that some of the things others do that drive us totally crazy are things that either they cannot help or that it would be VERY difficult for them to help. AND, since you have your own crazy (that, just to review, cannot be helped without a lot of work) you should give yourself a break. You deserve it
2. You're gunna make your kids crazy (it seems to be inevitable). Just try not to make them too crazy!
Januboring and Febuworse
Short and sweet:
I love the winter because it gets me in the Christmas spirit. The problem is that most of the winter comes AFTER Christmas which leads to at least a few months of not loving the weather. For this post I am simply looking for one of two things. The first is any suggestions of how to love the first two months of the year. The second is commiseration.
Let's here it.
I love the winter because it gets me in the Christmas spirit. The problem is that most of the winter comes AFTER Christmas which leads to at least a few months of not loving the weather. For this post I am simply looking for one of two things. The first is any suggestions of how to love the first two months of the year. The second is commiseration.
Let's here it.
Friday 23 November 2012
Do it!
Please, please, PLEASE enter my contest! In fact, I insist you do!! All entries will be anonymous, and no put downs are allowed, so there is no reason not to. And frankly, it is super fun to write for an audience, so get on it!
Monday 19 November 2012
The good, the bad, and the I can't tell the difference
Before I get to the meat of things I think I should lay bare my soul.
Favourite Books: I'll Love You Forever, Possessing The Secret of Joy, the Vampire Diaries and the Secret Circle, Unless, Fall On Your Knees
Favourite TV Shows: Sex and the City, Law and Order, The Wire, SYTYCD, Survivor
Favourite Albums/Artists: Anything Kellie or Melissa make me, Almost A Full Moon and any other Hawksley Workman album, Tuesday Night Music Club (Sheryl Crow), Gordon (Bare Naked Ladies), Michael Jackson, Bin Iver
*My Heart Is So Jetlegged is a song I like, but I don't know who it is by. Amanda someone with some guy band I think. (Heart heart, heart is so jetlegged. It is just plain catchy!)
Favourite Movies: The Princess Bride, Lord of the Rings the Fellowship of the Rings, Clueless, The Shawshank Redemption, Step Up 3 (and no I am not joking about that one)
So, as you can probably tell, I have some good taste and some bad taste. This I am perfectly aware of and will discuss the importance of this in a future post. But what really concerns me is that sometimes I can't tell the difference! Like, sometimes I think something is good but then find out it actually isn't. This is not the case with Monk. I'm sorry to anyone who liked it and to the writers and producers of the show (not Tony Shalhoub though because he actually did a pretty good job), but that show was awful!! Just because I watched all eight seasons doesn't mean I didn't know how awful it was.
Once after a car ride with a friend during which a City and Colour album was playing in my car I told said friend that sometimes I don't know if certain music is cool, or if in fact I should be embarrassed for listening to it. Her response? "Like Dallas Green?" Ouch. Then she added, "Or Sarah McLaughlin?" To which I wanted to respond, "Really? Sarah isn't safe? I know she isn't trendy, but I didn't know she is shameful!"
Basically, the point of this post is two fold:
1. To make you aware of the questionable taste the Treatster (another nickname) has, and
2. to...crap. I can't remember the second one. The sad thing is that I think the second one was more important and deeply poignant.
Oh well. Perhaps I will end with a question. Which of my likes from above do you think are in bad taste and why? I will respond to each comment to explain why all choices are actually awesome.
Favourite Books: I'll Love You Forever, Possessing The Secret of Joy, the Vampire Diaries and the Secret Circle, Unless, Fall On Your Knees
Favourite TV Shows: Sex and the City, Law and Order, The Wire, SYTYCD, Survivor
Favourite Albums/Artists: Anything Kellie or Melissa make me, Almost A Full Moon and any other Hawksley Workman album, Tuesday Night Music Club (Sheryl Crow), Gordon (Bare Naked Ladies), Michael Jackson, Bin Iver
*My Heart Is So Jetlegged is a song I like, but I don't know who it is by. Amanda someone with some guy band I think. (Heart heart, heart is so jetlegged. It is just plain catchy!)
Favourite Movies: The Princess Bride, Lord of the Rings the Fellowship of the Rings, Clueless, The Shawshank Redemption, Step Up 3 (and no I am not joking about that one)
So, as you can probably tell, I have some good taste and some bad taste. This I am perfectly aware of and will discuss the importance of this in a future post. But what really concerns me is that sometimes I can't tell the difference! Like, sometimes I think something is good but then find out it actually isn't. This is not the case with Monk. I'm sorry to anyone who liked it and to the writers and producers of the show (not Tony Shalhoub though because he actually did a pretty good job), but that show was awful!! Just because I watched all eight seasons doesn't mean I didn't know how awful it was.
Once after a car ride with a friend during which a City and Colour album was playing in my car I told said friend that sometimes I don't know if certain music is cool, or if in fact I should be embarrassed for listening to it. Her response? "Like Dallas Green?" Ouch. Then she added, "Or Sarah McLaughlin?" To which I wanted to respond, "Really? Sarah isn't safe? I know she isn't trendy, but I didn't know she is shameful!"
Basically, the point of this post is two fold:
1. To make you aware of the questionable taste the Treatster (another nickname) has, and
2. to...crap. I can't remember the second one. The sad thing is that I think the second one was more important and deeply poignant.
Oh well. Perhaps I will end with a question. Which of my likes from above do you think are in bad taste and why? I will respond to each comment to explain why all choices are actually awesome.
Sunday 18 November 2012
First annual guest post contest
Doesn't the title say it all?
Rules:
1. Anyone who wants to can create a guest post.
2. Anyone who wants to can read them and vote on their favourite.
3. Any negative comments will be removed. We enter into this contest in the spirit of fun!!
4. The writer of the guest post that gets the most votes will win a dinner date with me, Sue Treat, unless there is someone I don't know following me and they win, in which case they will win an enthusiastic congratulations.
Good luck!! I will accept and post entries up until December 30th. Good luck!
Rules:
1. Anyone who wants to can create a guest post.
2. Anyone who wants to can read them and vote on their favourite.
3. Any negative comments will be removed. We enter into this contest in the spirit of fun!!
4. The writer of the guest post that gets the most votes will win a dinner date with me, Sue Treat, unless there is someone I don't know following me and they win, in which case they will win an enthusiastic congratulations.
Good luck!! I will accept and post entries up until December 30th. Good luck!
Ultimate Thinky Think: The Meaning of Life (Solved!)
I don't know about the rest of you, but throughout my life I have often pondered the meaning of it all. "What is the meaning of life?" is a pretty big question and one that I have always thought was impossible to answer for many reasons, the first being that depending on your personal paradigm (religion and stuff) the question itself may mean something different.
WELL, just so you know, I solved it! I know the meaning!! Please keep in mind that I experienced this existential epiphany last night in a total sleep haze so it may in fact make little to no sense. In fact, I had to spend a few minutes just trying to remember what it was. Well, here it is.
Make the best of it.
I know this may sound silly, or overly simplified, so let me take you through my thought process. I was thinking about this topic and to try to get in the right mind frame I was thinking about other pursuits and the goals that go along with them. Very quickly I realized that you cannot compare the meaning of life to the meaning of having a family, or volunteering, or your job because these things are (usually) voluntary. You CHOOSE them. None of us (according to my paradigm) chose to be here. So, this got me thinking. What is the best thing you can do when put in a situation out of your control? Make the best of it! See how that works? If you are stuck in traffic you can be really angry and feel terrible, OR you can...you got it, make the best of it!
So dear reader, goodnight (or good day), and I hope you are able to make the best of whatever life is currently throwing your way!
WELL, just so you know, I solved it! I know the meaning!! Please keep in mind that I experienced this existential epiphany last night in a total sleep haze so it may in fact make little to no sense. In fact, I had to spend a few minutes just trying to remember what it was. Well, here it is.
Make the best of it.
I know this may sound silly, or overly simplified, so let me take you through my thought process. I was thinking about this topic and to try to get in the right mind frame I was thinking about other pursuits and the goals that go along with them. Very quickly I realized that you cannot compare the meaning of life to the meaning of having a family, or volunteering, or your job because these things are (usually) voluntary. You CHOOSE them. None of us (according to my paradigm) chose to be here. So, this got me thinking. What is the best thing you can do when put in a situation out of your control? Make the best of it! See how that works? If you are stuck in traffic you can be really angry and feel terrible, OR you can...you got it, make the best of it!
So dear reader, goodnight (or good day), and I hope you are able to make the best of whatever life is currently throwing your way!
Monday 12 November 2012
Christmas Traditions
The first thing you should be asking yourself is what the heck is Susie (this is what my good friends call me) going to blog about when Christmas is over? The answer? I'm pretty sure I will be doing five posts less a week, but we'll see.
This one is short and simple. I will share with you the best five Christmas traditions from my childhood, and I am hoping that then you will share your favourite traditions with me!!
Here they are:
1. For some reason my mom never went with us to get the tree and my dad never helped decorate it. What made going to get the tree with my dad so special is that every year my mom would give him about $40 for a tree and every year he would spend $80 to $100 to get the biggest, most beautiful tree he could.
2. Every Christmas Eve we (my siblings and I) would beg and beg to open a present. Everyone year my mom would eventually give in. And every year the present she would let us open would be socks or underwear. You would think we would stop asking!!
3. When we were really little Santa would put our stocking right at the end of our beds. I would wake up numerous times in the night to see if they were there. Eventually when they were I would wake up my siblings and we would look through them together. Then, at a somewhat reasonable time (6am) we would go into my parent's room and show them everything we got in our stockings before we opened presents.
4. My family loves reading and music and every year for Christmas we would all get new tapes or CDs and books. Christmas day was spent lounging in the living room reading our new books and cycling through the music.
5. As we got older we would often get envelopes for Christmas with homemade coupons for things we had asked for like a new pair of jeans. On Boxing Day my family would pile into the car and head to Kitchener to shop for the items from the coupons and then we would see a movie.
These memories may not sound like much, but just thinking about them warms me through and through. Please (please) tell me about your favourite Christmas tradition(s)! Feliz Navidad!
This one is short and simple. I will share with you the best five Christmas traditions from my childhood, and I am hoping that then you will share your favourite traditions with me!!
Here they are:
1. For some reason my mom never went with us to get the tree and my dad never helped decorate it. What made going to get the tree with my dad so special is that every year my mom would give him about $40 for a tree and every year he would spend $80 to $100 to get the biggest, most beautiful tree he could.
2. Every Christmas Eve we (my siblings and I) would beg and beg to open a present. Everyone year my mom would eventually give in. And every year the present she would let us open would be socks or underwear. You would think we would stop asking!!
3. When we were really little Santa would put our stocking right at the end of our beds. I would wake up numerous times in the night to see if they were there. Eventually when they were I would wake up my siblings and we would look through them together. Then, at a somewhat reasonable time (6am) we would go into my parent's room and show them everything we got in our stockings before we opened presents.
4. My family loves reading and music and every year for Christmas we would all get new tapes or CDs and books. Christmas day was spent lounging in the living room reading our new books and cycling through the music.
5. As we got older we would often get envelopes for Christmas with homemade coupons for things we had asked for like a new pair of jeans. On Boxing Day my family would pile into the car and head to Kitchener to shop for the items from the coupons and then we would see a movie.
These memories may not sound like much, but just thinking about them warms me through and through. Please (please) tell me about your favourite Christmas tradition(s)! Feliz Navidad!
No, you're a boogermuncher!
Boogermuncher is the new gay, (or retard, or spaz).
Most things in life are up for argument. One thing isn't. Saying "That's so gay" equates homosexuality with the negative. Um, duh. I think I am preaching to the converted here (ok two things are not up for argument: Saying 'preaching to the converted' in a blog makes you sound 100), but here is what I think anyway:
In life we should all take the same pledge doctors do: Amicus resilidus matulra. That means 'do no harm' in spanish. I mean latin. Ok, I made it up, but I know that it is some sort of pledge for docs. Anyway, shouldn't we all live our lives like this? Let's, as a people, try to stop hurting each other. I think many people use gay (or retard) honestly thinking they are not hurting anyone. Well newsflash boogermunchers, gay people are EVERYWHERE. And if they aren't, their family, friends, or co-workers are. The point? You never know who you are hurting, and since I know you don't want to hurt anyone, just substitute boogermuncher in the place of gay or retard. Problem solved. Tell a friend.
Next stop: World hunger.
Most things in life are up for argument. One thing isn't. Saying "That's so gay" equates homosexuality with the negative. Um, duh. I think I am preaching to the converted here (ok two things are not up for argument: Saying 'preaching to the converted' in a blog makes you sound 100), but here is what I think anyway:
In life we should all take the same pledge doctors do: Amicus resilidus matulra. That means 'do no harm' in spanish. I mean latin. Ok, I made it up, but I know that it is some sort of pledge for docs. Anyway, shouldn't we all live our lives like this? Let's, as a people, try to stop hurting each other. I think many people use gay (or retard) honestly thinking they are not hurting anyone. Well newsflash boogermunchers, gay people are EVERYWHERE. And if they aren't, their family, friends, or co-workers are. The point? You never know who you are hurting, and since I know you don't want to hurt anyone, just substitute boogermuncher in the place of gay or retard. Problem solved. Tell a friend.
Next stop: World hunger.
Tuesday 6 November 2012
My Christmas Favs/Dear Mom
For me, picking a favourite Christmas song is like trying to pick a favourite chocolate bar. The fav chocolate bar situation goes something like this:
Hey Sue, what is your favourite chocolate bar?
Um, well, Mr. Big, Crunchie, Crispy Crunch, Mars, Snickers, Twix, oh and I really like M&Ms, Sweet Marie and Mint Aero and Mirage...oh and I ALSO love Junior Mints and Whoppers. (The list really could continue.)
So, my favourite Christmas songs are "Drummer Boy," (there is a great version of this song originally done by Frank Sinatra and David Bowie and it was recently redone by Matt Dusk and Hawksley Workman -- you should check it out), "I Saw Three Ships ," "It's Cold Outside," "Jingle Bells," "Do You Hear What I Hear," "O Holy Night," and "Silent Night." But as much as I love all of those, every song from the album Almost a Full Moon by Hawksley Workman is above and beyond them all. I won't touch on that now though because I will be dedicating an entire post to the album later on.
My favourite Christmas movies are The Grinch, Love Actually, and the Muppet Christmas Movie
(Does everyone appreciate how I am moving seamlessly between APA and MLA formatting?)
(Also, I really think everyone should take some time and listen to the Reality Bites soundtrack this weekend and then tell me your favourite song.)
When I tried to think of my favourite Christmas presents, I had a really hard time. I love Christmas, and I LOVE presents, so why was it so hard to think of them? Well, I realized that it is because every single Christmas I have gotten many extremely thoughtful presents. In short, I have been totally spoiled. For my entire life my mom made sure, no matter what, that Christmas was a very special time, and now I have a husband who does the same. So, I will give you a list of some of my favourite presents I have gotten over the years: R.L. Stine books, Christopher Pike books, pink glittery sweater, Ravensburger puzzles, Little Miss Make-Up, a duvet. I also have to give a little shout out to my sister here because she often gives me super great childhood throw back gifts (like Janet Jackson's Rhythm Nation and numerous L.J. Smith novels).
So, thinking about how much I love Christmas and WHY I love Christmas made me think of two things:
1. The reason Christmas is such a special time for me is because my mom made sure it would be. She made is a magical time. And now even though she is gone (chances are since only my lovelies read this you already know, but just in case I have a mystery reader, my mom died some years ago) I have so many other loved ones with whom to share the holidays. If it wasn't for my mom I KNOW I wouldn't feel the same way about Christmas, and if it wasn't for YOU I know since her death that Christmas would be ruined.
2. Maybe this is presumptuous, but I think perhaps those people who do not love Christmas feel like that because there was no one in their lives who could bring them (or teach them) the joy of Christmas. For these people, I am sorry that a time that brings others so much joy is perhaps at best an irritant and at worst a painful time. Man am I lucky to have the mom I did.
CHRISTMAS UPDATE:
I have already made, decorated, and eaten one Rice Crispies Christmas house
AND
Christmas music has been blaring in my house and car since November 1st (although only two CDs because I cannot yet find the others)
AND
I pulled out my first Christmas puzzle to work on with big plans to start sorting out the edge pieces tomorrow
Don't worry, I'll keep you posted.
Why does this post have 'Dear Mom' in the title? I'll tell you why. I am not one for regrets, but one thing that has really saddened me lately is that I cannot thank my mom for all she did to make Christmas such an amazing time. I cannot tell her about all the traditions I love that I plan to carry on with my own daughter. (In case you don't know or couldn't figure it out, my mom is dead.) Just to clarify, from the end of August until probably December 28th or so (that is four months, which is one third of the year in case you wondered) I feel the Christmas spirit coursing through my body. What is the Christmas spirit you may ask? It is a feeling of joy, hope, promise, selflessness, and love. And I get to feel like this, one of the greatest feelings there is, thanks to my mom. So, I highly encourage you, in fact I insist, that you take a second (or an hour) and think about the amazing things your mom (or mom like person--even a dad or grandparent will do) does for you and then write her (if you are lucky enough to have this person still in your life) and say thanks -- hence the 'Dear Mom' part. I know this might be a bit cliche, but honestly, you should do it. Dead people can't read. No matter how much you wish they could, they just can't.
Joy to the world, 49 sleeps 'til Christmas.
Hey Sue, what is your favourite chocolate bar?
Um, well, Mr. Big, Crunchie, Crispy Crunch, Mars, Snickers, Twix, oh and I really like M&Ms, Sweet Marie and Mint Aero and Mirage...oh and I ALSO love Junior Mints and Whoppers. (The list really could continue.)
So, my favourite Christmas songs are "Drummer Boy," (there is a great version of this song originally done by Frank Sinatra and David Bowie and it was recently redone by Matt Dusk and Hawksley Workman -- you should check it out), "I Saw Three Ships ," "It's Cold Outside," "Jingle Bells," "Do You Hear What I Hear," "O Holy Night," and "Silent Night." But as much as I love all of those, every song from the album Almost a Full Moon by Hawksley Workman is above and beyond them all. I won't touch on that now though because I will be dedicating an entire post to the album later on.
My favourite Christmas movies are The Grinch, Love Actually, and the Muppet Christmas Movie
(Does everyone appreciate how I am moving seamlessly between APA and MLA formatting?)
(Also, I really think everyone should take some time and listen to the Reality Bites soundtrack this weekend and then tell me your favourite song.)
When I tried to think of my favourite Christmas presents, I had a really hard time. I love Christmas, and I LOVE presents, so why was it so hard to think of them? Well, I realized that it is because every single Christmas I have gotten many extremely thoughtful presents. In short, I have been totally spoiled. For my entire life my mom made sure, no matter what, that Christmas was a very special time, and now I have a husband who does the same. So, I will give you a list of some of my favourite presents I have gotten over the years: R.L. Stine books, Christopher Pike books, pink glittery sweater, Ravensburger puzzles, Little Miss Make-Up, a duvet. I also have to give a little shout out to my sister here because she often gives me super great childhood throw back gifts (like Janet Jackson's Rhythm Nation and numerous L.J. Smith novels).
So, thinking about how much I love Christmas and WHY I love Christmas made me think of two things:
1. The reason Christmas is such a special time for me is because my mom made sure it would be. She made is a magical time. And now even though she is gone (chances are since only my lovelies read this you already know, but just in case I have a mystery reader, my mom died some years ago) I have so many other loved ones with whom to share the holidays. If it wasn't for my mom I KNOW I wouldn't feel the same way about Christmas, and if it wasn't for YOU I know since her death that Christmas would be ruined.
2. Maybe this is presumptuous, but I think perhaps those people who do not love Christmas feel like that because there was no one in their lives who could bring them (or teach them) the joy of Christmas. For these people, I am sorry that a time that brings others so much joy is perhaps at best an irritant and at worst a painful time. Man am I lucky to have the mom I did.
CHRISTMAS UPDATE:
I have already made, decorated, and eaten one Rice Crispies Christmas house
AND
Christmas music has been blaring in my house and car since November 1st (although only two CDs because I cannot yet find the others)
AND
I pulled out my first Christmas puzzle to work on with big plans to start sorting out the edge pieces tomorrow
Don't worry, I'll keep you posted.
Why does this post have 'Dear Mom' in the title? I'll tell you why. I am not one for regrets, but one thing that has really saddened me lately is that I cannot thank my mom for all she did to make Christmas such an amazing time. I cannot tell her about all the traditions I love that I plan to carry on with my own daughter. (In case you don't know or couldn't figure it out, my mom is dead.) Just to clarify, from the end of August until probably December 28th or so (that is four months, which is one third of the year in case you wondered) I feel the Christmas spirit coursing through my body. What is the Christmas spirit you may ask? It is a feeling of joy, hope, promise, selflessness, and love. And I get to feel like this, one of the greatest feelings there is, thanks to my mom. So, I highly encourage you, in fact I insist, that you take a second (or an hour) and think about the amazing things your mom (or mom like person--even a dad or grandparent will do) does for you and then write her (if you are lucky enough to have this person still in your life) and say thanks -- hence the 'Dear Mom' part. I know this might be a bit cliche, but honestly, you should do it. Dead people can't read. No matter how much you wish they could, they just can't.
Joy to the world, 49 sleeps 'til Christmas.
Be a good Canadian. Volunteer?
As I was reading that Discover Canada pamphlet online for the post about culture, I came across something that surprised me. Under the section called Responsibilities, it had a subheading called 'Helping others in the community,' which talked about how many Canadians volunteer in some capacity or another, and how this is an important part of being Canadian. This got me thinking about the good intentions I have that usually amount to nothing. Other than my feeling that a responsibility to volunteer might well be an oxymoron, I do really like this idea. I mean, don't you think that this is a great Canadian cultural value? Helping others? Well, I sure do. The problem for many of us is that it can be difficult to find the time. I was going to say that I wish they had included the option of making donations as another way of 'helping others in the community' but then stopped myself because they are very different things. One is time costly, and the other is pocket book costly. It made me start to wonder about the importance of getting ones' hands dirty so to speak. So dear reader, what do you think? Is volunteering more important or valuable than monetary donations? Love to hear what you think.
In the mean time I must say that I am feeling pretty darn good about myself because I have made contact with a women's shelter in my town and have found some simple ways to help out. I haven't even done anything yet but still feel pretty amazing! Second question: why does helping others just feel so darn good? Let's hear your thoughts faithful reader!
In the mean time I must say that I am feeling pretty darn good about myself because I have made contact with a women's shelter in my town and have found some simple ways to help out. I haven't even done anything yet but still feel pretty amazing! Second question: why does helping others just feel so darn good? Let's hear your thoughts faithful reader!
Sunday 4 November 2012
Peace, love, and drawing the line PART 2
One of the things that got me thinking about this subject was an episode of Ideas I listened to early last week. Although I claimed to be up on current events in my first posting, I have to admit that the episode was from 2010. Anyway, the episode was from a series about being Canadian and this specific episode was about immigration. What caught my attention was the following excerpt from Discover Canada: The rights and responsibilities of citizenship, an immigration handbook published by the federal government: (Is this the appropriate use of a colon? Can someone tell me?)
In Canada, men and women are equal under the law. Canada’s openness and generosity do not extend to barbaric cultural practices that tolerate spousal abuse, “honour killings,” female genital mutilation, forced marriage or other gender-based violence. Those guilty of these crimes are severely punished under Canada’s criminal laws.
This got me thinking that in fact there IS a place for commenting on cultural practices and apparently the place is a Canadian immigration handbook. For real though, as much as I really struggle with the idea of judging cultural practices, it did warm my heart that my government knows where they draw the line. And I love this line. I feel good about being on the Canadian side of this line. I only hope my government doesn't attempt to redraw this line (and put abortion on the other side), but more on that later. Maybe. The point is that in this moment I am glad there are people who do see the importance of not accepting all human behaviour, and instead stating quite clearly that certain behaviours or practices are completely unacceptable. Two points human rights! (Human rights had to get two points or it would have been a tie with open-mindedness and I feel like that would have been a really anticlimactic way to end for first blog series.)
Now if we could only get God outta the national anthem. Just kidding. Kinda.
In Canada, men and women are equal under the law. Canada’s openness and generosity do not extend to barbaric cultural practices that tolerate spousal abuse, “honour killings,” female genital mutilation, forced marriage or other gender-based violence. Those guilty of these crimes are severely punished under Canada’s criminal laws.
This got me thinking that in fact there IS a place for commenting on cultural practices and apparently the place is a Canadian immigration handbook. For real though, as much as I really struggle with the idea of judging cultural practices, it did warm my heart that my government knows where they draw the line. And I love this line. I feel good about being on the Canadian side of this line. I only hope my government doesn't attempt to redraw this line (and put abortion on the other side), but more on that later. Maybe. The point is that in this moment I am glad there are people who do see the importance of not accepting all human behaviour, and instead stating quite clearly that certain behaviours or practices are completely unacceptable. Two points human rights! (Human rights had to get two points or it would have been a tie with open-mindedness and I feel like that would have been a really anticlimactic way to end for first blog series.)
Now if we could only get God outta the national anthem. Just kidding. Kinda.
Saturday 3 November 2012
What is Argo?
If you want a headache, a sore stomach, and to experience a high level of anxiety for two hours, go and see Fargo, I mean Argo.
I wish I had something super interesting to say about this film, but I don't. However, there were three worthwhile *kinda quotes that happened around the film.
*Kinda Quotes are things that someone sorta said. They are altered either because I can't remember what was said exactly or because a slight re-imagining makes them more interesting.
1. After telling a friend I was going to see this movie he commented, "That movie is in the Oscar race. Doesn't sound like your kinda movie." (To be clear, he was trying to zip me.)
2. Me to my movie friend after about ten minutes in, "I think this movie is too smart for me."
3. My movie friend's response, "No it's not! Um, why did the ________ do the ___________?" (She was asking a clarifying question. I blanked out key words as I don't know them and also as to not spoil the film.)
Just to clarify, I'm not saying the movie wasn't super good, super engaging, really intense, well directed (I think), well acted, etc. etc. I AM. It's just that there are probably way more qualified people who have already written way insightful reviews. Check them out. I have another Christmas post to write.
I wish I had something super interesting to say about this film, but I don't. However, there were three worthwhile *kinda quotes that happened around the film.
*Kinda Quotes are things that someone sorta said. They are altered either because I can't remember what was said exactly or because a slight re-imagining makes them more interesting.
1. After telling a friend I was going to see this movie he commented, "That movie is in the Oscar race. Doesn't sound like your kinda movie." (To be clear, he was trying to zip me.)
2. Me to my movie friend after about ten minutes in, "I think this movie is too smart for me."
3. My movie friend's response, "No it's not! Um, why did the ________ do the ___________?" (She was asking a clarifying question. I blanked out key words as I don't know them and also as to not spoil the film.)
Just to clarify, I'm not saying the movie wasn't super good, super engaging, really intense, well directed (I think), well acted, etc. etc. I AM. It's just that there are probably way more qualified people who have already written way insightful reviews. Check them out. I have another Christmas post to write.
Peace, love, and drawing the line PART ONE
What made me think:
I am a high school teacher, and in the past when I taught about certain issues I would expect strong negative reactions. Well, what I have learned is that students seem far more open minded than I thought they would be. For example, when discussing polygamy I expected students to think it was wrong. The funny thing is that when they didn't (which was inevitably the case) I was disappointed. What is even funnier than that is that one of the first things I taught in that class was the dangers of ethnocentrism (the belief that what is normal in one's own culture should be normal everywhere). So, you would think that I would be really happy with my students for not harshly judging a different cultural practice. One point open-mindedness! So, why was I disappointed? Because I believe that certain cultural practices are wrong, and I was DISAPPOINTED when students did not see it the same way. (Don't worry, I play it totally cool in class.) So, does the fact that I negatively judge other people's practices make me ethnocentric? Judgemental? Snobby? Closed minded?
*Please note that even saying that I think some cultural practices are wrong does make me slightly uncomfortable.
What I think:
NO. In fact, it may make me thoughtful, critical, and humanistic, and for me it most definitely makes me a feminist.
NO. In fact, it may make me thoughtful, critical, and humanistic, and for me it most definitely makes me a feminist.
(Of course I would say that, I mean I am talking about myself. But let me explain.)
If there were a cultural practice of murdering babies (oh oops, there is) I think it is pretty safe to say that is not ok. If there were a practice of cutting off people's arms for fun, again, not cool. These of course are pretty extreme examples, although the first was accidentally realistic. What gets trickier is when the practice is a little less clear cut. What about eating cat? Refusing birth control? Female genital mutilation? Honour killings? (Male) circumcision? Polygamy? Etc. Etc. Etc. Well, I honestly believe in my heart of hearts that saying something is ok, or even remaining indifferent towards something because it is a cultural practice is intellectually lazy. What I often heard from students was something along the lines of, "Well, I wouldn't do it, but if they want to it is their right." I think this is a great idea when looking at super weird (to me) food different people enjoy, or clothes that people wear that seem strange, but what about when it comes to how people are treated? Do we, as humans, have a right and perhaps even a responsibility to judge the practices of others? If it is culturally normal or acceptable to stone a woman to death because she claims she was raped but cannot prove it and therefore the sex is merely adulterous, should we (you and I) not be asking ourselves if this is ok? I think (hope) the answer to that is pretty clear.
Why it's tricky:
The problem is that assuming we will agree that the above example is wrong also assumes that we agree that rape exists conceptually, that a woman does have the right to decide whether she does or does not want to have sex. This is where things get really tricky, as morality seems to be almost purely subjective. Assuming that everything you learned from agents of socialization is true and good is foolish at best, so how do you decide what is RIGHT? Well, perhaps this is the way faith comes into my life. I have faith that if I listen to my heart and the hearts of others, that what is right will become clear.
I think there are two key questions you can ask yourself to determine if you are being ethnocentric or healthily critical.
1. Does the practice in question harm someone?
2. Can you think of aspects of your own culture that you question? (For example, high heels. Really? They hurt. Anyone who says they don't is lying. Are women still causing themselves physical pain in order to look more sexually appealing for men? Yes, they (I mean WE...'cause I do it too) still are.
So, the point of all this is to say please try to create peace and love in your world but also think about where you draw the line. Not everything is ok, and pretending (or believing) it is ignores, minimizes or accepts some of the very terrible things that go on in this big blue and green world.
Why it's tricky:
The problem is that assuming we will agree that the above example is wrong also assumes that we agree that rape exists conceptually, that a woman does have the right to decide whether she does or does not want to have sex. This is where things get really tricky, as morality seems to be almost purely subjective. Assuming that everything you learned from agents of socialization is true and good is foolish at best, so how do you decide what is RIGHT? Well, perhaps this is the way faith comes into my life. I have faith that if I listen to my heart and the hearts of others, that what is right will become clear.
I think there are two key questions you can ask yourself to determine if you are being ethnocentric or healthily critical.
1. Does the practice in question harm someone?
2. Can you think of aspects of your own culture that you question? (For example, high heels. Really? They hurt. Anyone who says they don't is lying. Are women still causing themselves physical pain in order to look more sexually appealing for men? Yes, they (I mean WE...'cause I do it too) still are.
So, the point of all this is to say please try to create peace and love in your world but also think about where you draw the line. Not everything is ok, and pretending (or believing) it is ignores, minimizes or accepts some of the very terrible things that go on in this big blue and green world.
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